Sad. Tired. Sleepy. Unhappy.

my last post was exactly one week ago... been really busy meeting deadlines for assignments that i dun have the time to blog. never really had a good sleep too. been staying up late to finish things up...

things have not been going my way lately... been stressful at school, been physically tired, and emotionally drained as well...

constant conflicts arising within the project group. while certain close friends will take comments in their stride and we still remain as good friends, its harder to talk to those who are not so close. its so hard to want to talk to a person about them doing their part in the wrong track, but yet on the other hand, not wanting to hurt their feelings. so lose a friend or make an enemy? wad's ur view?

had my last lecture of the semester todae. it was ok though i was dreaming. my heart was feeling so heavy. so many things inside of me. and the worst thing is, there's no one to pour it out. alicia: u know i nearly wanted to go and find you after my lecture?!! but i had to come home coz i had project to do. i know u are proudly on leave till next week, which i am so envious about...

i heard on class 95's love songs that "faults are thick while love is thin" isn't that true in every relationship? you tend to see the bad about your partner, but the good, you'll never appreciate? sometimes even taking for granted their presence in your life. maybe some ppl in love will feel that its not necessary to appreciate your special someone for being in your life, or for doing things for you, becoz they love you, even if its juz the simplest thing, you feel that its their duty to do so. however, i still think that people need to be motivated (sounds like a sentence from management thought and hrm lectures). everyone loves praises which are good to the ears. but how far would you go to make your partner happy? how often do you show your gestures of love? human beings are filled with hatred, including me as well. more often than not, we tend to hate ppl more than we like ppl. same theory applies to relationships... when your partner makes a mistake, its the biggest fault, the unforgivable, most sinful, the worst mistake! but when your partner showered you with gifts, love, affection and sweet nothings, did you think that way? mistakes are so easy to spot, but love is so easy to ruin. class 95 also mentioned another quote, "love is selfless". to me it is only true to a certain extent. i dunno wad made me write this long huge chunk of rubbish theory on love and hate. but it made me think on the way back home after lecture when i was listening to class 95's love songs. and all the songs seem to make my heart bleed. then came the bus which had too many people which left me stranded at the bus stop which seemed like forever.

i can't wait for everything to be over so that i can get out of singapore for a breather. things over here are sad and blue.

hopefully tomorrow would be a better day.

please guide me thru my way.

I thought that you'd be loving me.
I thought you were the one who'd stay forever.
But now forever's come and gone.
And I'm still here alone.
Cause you were only playing,
You were only playing with my heart.
I was never waiting,
I was never waiting for the tears to start.

It was you who put the clouds around me.
It was you who made the tears fall down.
It was you who broke my heart in pieces.
It was you, it was you who made my blue eyes blue.

I never should have trusted you.
I thought that I'd be all you need.
In your eyes I thought I saw my heaven.
And now my heaven's gone away.
And I'm out in the cold.
Cause you had me believing,
You had me believing in a lie.
Guess I couldn't see it,
I guess I couldn't see it till I saw goodbye.

Oh, I never should have trusted you.

i'll blog some other time when i have the energy, time and strength. back to projects for now...

ta-ta...

Please Read...

in school now... but i'm back with a purpose... i didn't intend to blog but i read xiaxue's blog.... an entry on weak women... worth reading... will not comment much about it coz its a little sensitive ar... read it and you'll know...

haven't blogged for a week, have been busy travelling to and fro to national libray and school... this week alone, i carried lappy four times already... stressing me out on the travelling alone. very very very tired liao... i need some TLC please! haha...

i'll blog when i get back... back to projects for now...

ta-ta...

Food!

for those who are not studying at SIM, our university serve refreshments after every lecture... and for the first time in my life, i saw green egg tarts... i dunno if you've seen it before... but i was certainly "wow-ed"... i had to try it! it was pandan i think... and it smelled good... not bad though...

jie jie bought these cadbury snaps from aussie... really thin pieces of chocolates with crushed nuts which look like pringles potato chips... very nice! too bad they dun have it in singapore... it comes in 3 flavours, which includes milk chocolate, hazelnut and orange...

didn't blog over the weekend coz i haven't been home for the past 2 nights... hee... been at dear's place... going to the library to find books for my project, studying till late nights together and going out for supper... which is damn sinful lar... hee... but its once in a blue moon. so why not indulge first then say? hee...

and since mcdonalds operates 24 hours now... i decided to get a cheeseburger last nite coz i had a craving for it... at 2am in the cold chilly morning, we walked to mcdonalds, chatting and talking on the way.... heee... so happie... but ever since this thought of chesseburger, dear kept teasing me ever since... our conversation as follows...

the good old double cheese burger with pickles~

ahhh... heavenly~

dear: wad u wanna eat?

me: i got craving for cheeseburger.

dear: so late still wanna eat cheeseburger?

me: (feeling guilty) huh... then go where eat?

dear: no lar, if you want cheeseburger, we go get cheeseburger.

me: heehee... (but still guilty lar!)

later today....

dear: wah! at my house eat alot junk ar?

me: hmph! very wad...

dear: C-H-E-E-S-E-B-U-R-G-E-R.....

dear's mean ar? very mean indeed! teasing me makes him happie...

dear: WE ATE ALOT! hahaha! no doubt u are mean, but still thanks for carrying my heavy library books and for bringing me out late at nite to have supper... studying together is wad we always do, but until the wee hours of the morning is unusual... nevertheless, it feels wonderful to be 48 hours together once in a while...

tomorrow is back to projects again... haiz... i hate it leh! i hate the subject... management thought is the worst subject i've ever studied! and i think this year is the year which i have been to the libraries in singapore the most times...

i guess i better logoff soon...

tomorrow's WAR TIME!

ta-ta...

Back To Post...

haven't blogged for a long time besides the little note that i left for dear 2 days ago... becoz i had my first test in uni life... it was okay though...

loads of stuff to update...

firstly, new cage for tubby and pixie! cost me a cool $36 bucks for their double storey bungalow accompanied with a full set of staircase, wheel and waterbottle... house and food bowl not included. both ham hams lurve their new home... faithfully playing on their wheel every nite without fail... and their current favourite food is fresh corn kernel...

aniwae, met the gals yesterday for dinner... chilled at marina's sakae sushi even though ppl hate to go there now coz of IMF... had a wonderful time chatting, laughing and most importantly, eating! the pics speak for itself!

and yes! we wiped out 22 plates!

proceeded to shopping for dresses with the gals after dinner. alicia needed one for zuomin's wedding, and i needed one for my cousin's wedding... tried alot... but only took one pic...

din buy anything in the end... i felt it wasn't appropriate... alicia tried on a pretty red floral dress! heee....

we headed from marina to suntec... despite the tight security due to the IMF, we are still determined to go to suntec... however, we failed... haha... aniwae, all shops are closed already! its 10 plus at nite! we strolled along suntec and marina... and look wad we found!

SUNFLOWERS IN SINGAPORE!

it was dark, hence the low quality of the pic... but they actually planted a whole stretch of sunflowers coz the delegates are coming... sadly, they look like they are dying.... hee....

nevertheless, i had a great time with them... my best galfrens... my best buddies...

ta-ta...

5 Years & 10 Months...

for dear:

i dun say this often, coz we've been together for so long... some things need not be told or said coz we simply understand each other... but today, 5 years and 10 months later, i'm really glad we're still together... we've weathered tough times together... and no matter what other people said, it all fell on deaf ears, coz i knew you were the one. i'll never forget our memories, silly moments together, and secrets between us.

in short, like i always say, thank you for always being there for me without ever complaining... no matter wad the time is, i know you're the only hotline i can dial when i need to...

to me, and juz me, you are a wonderful boyfriend...

i'm happy...

ta-ta...

Sleeping In...

had trouble sleeping last nite because i was having blocked nose. it doesn't help if i breathe through the mouth coz it makes my throat dry... been feeling so tired... body aches like its gonna fall apart... woke up this morning, and green phelgm had set in... felt a sickly body when i crawled out of bed... still sneezing, but i'm on medication given by mummy. thank god there's no lectures todae. but i wonder hell am i gonna survive tomorrow's long day... i wonder if i have the energy to push myself until 10pm at nite...

i have to get myself cured as soon as possible to prepare for wednesday's test...

help me...

before i end todae's entry....

So faithfully
Holding tight to every dream I thought our love would ever be
As the scent of hope slips through my fingers plain for me to see
I can feel now in your eyes the changing way you look at me
Where's the love we knew would last us eternally?

And will your arms still hold me?
And your eyes console me?
Baby please don't turn your back and just pretend
That your heart still needs me
And your soul completes me
Can we find a way to fall in love again?

It's hard for you
When your heart has opened up to feelings that you never knew
Never thinking that you'd doubt our love
You don't know what to do
I'd give anything,
My heart, my soul
If i could pull you through
Just to find again my love we hold so true

And as everything night goes by
With every lonely tear I cry
It's so clear to me
I need you by my side

Can we find a way to fall in love again?

Oh baby, I need you to love me for the rest of my life
If we fall in love again,
would you love me for the rest of my life?

ta-ta...

Flu~

i'm half drowsy now after popping my flu pills~ been down with a very bad flu... so glad to be home... really had a tough day battling with my flu and enduring my very long day.... i'm still continuing sneezing though i've taken my medicine. haiz... wrong timing to be sick... supposed to be studying. but i can't even take it... mummy gave me the pills 2 hours ago... and i'm falling asleeepppp~

and to make things worst, i'm having sore throat, blocked nose and ears... luckily tomorrow no lectures...

dear's out with his army buddies. i reckon he'll be home late tonite.... haven't talked to him for the whole day...

need to feed pixie and tubby before tucking into bed...

i need alot of rest...

ta-ta...

Tubby & Pixie

i have officially named my ham-hams...

boy-boy will be called tubby, which means fatty.. hehe.. coz he's like a round ball of fur...

girl-girl will be called pixie, which means playful...

went to do some research on dictionary.com before deciding....

lurve u tubby and pixie...

ta-ta...

Hamsters!

juz bought 2 hamsters 2 days ago... so happie! hee.... its a gurl and a boy... lurve them so muchie! they are of sapphire breed. but i haven't named them. thot of toffee for the boy and sugar for the gurl.. then i tot of kiki and lala. but then, i still can't confirm. for now, i juz call them girl-girl and boy-boy. any names to suggest?

boy-boy is toffee coloured brown and girl-girl is white with greyish fur on top.

aniwae, pics of my beloved darlings~

that's girl-girl sitting in the food bowl

that's sleepy boy-boy munching on "tau geys"

still munching~

that's my pretty girl-girl

jie's back from aussie. loads of cadbury's (which are not available in singapore) and tim tams. oh gosh... its gonna be so fattening...

aniwae, i managed to close another auction sale on my yahoo auctions site! had a deal with the buyer yesterday evening. sold my adidas green army-looking bag... haha.. at $50.. yippie! second transaction closed! so happie... dear sweet enuff to accompany me to meet the buyer when he was already so tired after school...

submitted my 3rd individual assignment todae. another one crossed out of my list. phew~ the kind of relief can't be described when i threw the report into the submission box...

i am officially down with sore throat. going from bad to worse... haiz... its been painful all day todae... arrgghh!!

ta-ta...