didn't meet dear todae.. he went to pulau ubin to cycle with his friends. those reading my blog muz be feeling surprised! haha.. jul at home on a saturday?? yeah.. wad to do? we have been quarrelling over the same problem for the past few days. taken our relationship into a strain. i wished this week never happened in my life..
was dreading this saturdae to come. coz it juz feels so weird. toked to dear till the wee hours last nite. toked alot, really toked. but i guess, it wasn't fruitful.. he told me many things of which i didn't know. and somehow, though i know that he's not telling me all this coz he wants to win my sympathy or wad, but i juz feel like i'm a thorn in his life. i regretted entering his life. i regretted saying "yes" to this relationship. i regretted being his girlfriend. coz i'm juz like a barrier between his friends. i dunno wad i'm supposed to do. a little care and understanding.. that's wad he said. but when i need ur understanding, u were never gonna understand. u are never gonna understand how tired i am to meet you after school.. i felt like the worst girlfriend on earth yesterdae. i felt like a failure. i didn't know wad u wanted, i can't read your mind. and i wonder, how some people can juz walk out of relationships as and when they like. love hurts so much, though the happiness you receive is double.. love was never easy at all.. it is always easier said than done. promises are hard to keep and old habits die hard. if i could ever turn back time. i wouldn't wanna be in a relationship.. it juz hurts too badly..
i hope tonite passes even more quickly. i juz wanna slp and wake up to find myself on mondae. this is the first time i hated weekends.
but though so many things happened. i'm glad that i spent time with my parents. daddy drove us to PS.. in his new car! hahaha.. so nice.. leather seats and everything.. then went for lunch at lao beijing. ate until $90++ whoa.. haha.. i loved the xiao long bao and the peking duck. of course there were other things too! hehe.. then went to carrefour to get some groceries and junk.. haha.. by the time we drove back, it was already 5 plus. i'm so glad that half of the day is gone. i'm juz so sian. i think i never wanna get this week back anymore..
dear, our relationship is taken to another level of test again. hope we are able to pass it.. the last thing i wanna do, is to lose you. i thot of letting you go.. but i have no courage to do it. actually i know u can do it without me.. i dunno how u would feel if i told u this. i'm juz gonna gif each of us another chance. work things out. hopefully, we knoe where we are getting at... lastly.. i still love u all the same...
love and relationships are such complicated stuffs....
ta-ta...
